A Letter to My Younger Self

A Letter to My Younger Self. This has been a thing the last few years.   Articles and books have been written and songs have been song.
I never paid much attention or got into the letter for my younger selftrend.  Things happen, or don't. You live, you learn. You move on. Why would I spend the time doing that exercise when there are barely enough hours in a day as is?   Until recently.

Mark 12:30-31 - This verse has been on my heart for months. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength.  Love your neighbour as yourself.   The 2 Greatest commands from Jesus.  There is no greater than these.
Everything else should fall into place if we could only do these. I want to give God every area of my life. I want to serve him with every area of my life. This also includes self care because he created me. This is what I want to share about today.

I think 4 different ways are mentioned because as humans we are divided into those 4 different parts.
We are emotional, …

From Peace 2018 into Faithful 2019

My Word for 2018

What comes to mind when you think of the word peace? 
Peace of mind
Peace and quiet
Peace on earth
Peace that passes understanding
Peace out man/ Peace Love
Sleep in heavenly peace

If you look up peace in the dictionary you will see things like:
freedom from disturbance, tranquility, serenity,
freedom from or cessation of war or violence,
a ceremonial greeting, handshake or kiss exchanged in some churches
used as a greeting or an order to remain silent.

The origin is old French pais and latin pax - peace

Back in 2017 I was struggling. I knew I was lacking peace in my life and I knew some of what was needed to achieve it.  I didn't want to go one more year like that. I set out to intentionally find and create peace in my life where I knew I could.

I have learned.

Peace is not something you wish for, it's something you make, something you do, something you are, and something you give away.    - Robert Fulghum

Whatever you can’t stand about yourself — Jesus stand…

The Hard but Good and All The Firsts

It was 5 months ago today I lost my brother.  That first night of our vacation we were so excited about. That night. That phone call. That spine chilling gut wrenching phone call night.  He's gone. Gone? What does that mean?!  Passed away. Dead.
 Suddenly, unexpectedly gone.

The next morning was Canada Day and one of the main reasons why we were on vacation. Less than 24 hrs later. A full day of festivities planned with the grandkids.  How could Canada Day go on?  I know Paul would have wanted me to celebrate Canada Day as he was very patriotic and especially to enjoy my grandkids as he adored his own. But it should be cancelled. Couldn't we just stop a minute or at least press pause?  Don't they (all of Canada) know how wrong this is?!  Walking through crowds of people with my brain in a fog, I try to stay in the moment and grounded as I watch them sway to the band, cheer on the parade and joyfully play bean bag toss.  The bean bags fly through the air in slow motion. At …

Me and Wally. Faith + Family + Football

It's Saturday afternoon. I am chatting on the phone with my sister.  We are catching up and sharing our weekend plans with each other.  I start telling her that I am getting ready to go the the football game and what a big deal it is because Wally is retiring. I even made him a sign. I have never made a sign for an event before. Frankly I think people who do that are weird and nerdy. What have I become?  But it's Wally, and it's his last home game. The very least I can do. Suddenly I feel my throat start to close.  Now the tears are flowing. Why am I so emotional?   Could it be because my brother just passed away a few months ago and I am still feeling raw?  Maybe I'm overly sensitive? This is embarrassing! I am a sign making nerd and I am crying!

Then she says it. "It's because he reminds you of dad isn't it?  Yes, that is definitely part of it. I cannot see Wally Buono without thinking of my father. Ever.  (although Wally is much younger) It is something…

It's a Wonderful Life - I Want to Write Again!

It's a Wonderful Life - I Want to Live Again!

It has been a really rough summer. I almost deleted this blog and was ready to give up on the whole thing. I had no motivation or inspiration and didn't see the point. I am so glad I know better than to act on those types decisions when I am in a dark place. Perhaps I have more of a story to tell after all. 
September 29, 2018                                                         
The Summer Lost but Something Found On the very first day of my much anticipated week of vacation, at the very beginning of summer, my brother died.  Since that day I have been dealing with all that is grief. The many shapes and forms it takes on.  God got me through I know, but to be honest, I don’t really remember the rest of the summer. It is a blur, totally disconnected.  Until the last week of August.   Another much anticipated, very much needed, week of vacation. Looking forward to the visits with friends, the fun outings, the rest, and the day…

22 Days of Losing Paul

Week One: It is a very strange feeling. I know I will be ok, and I know that I have much love and support but life will never be the same again. There is this huge, bold mark on my timeline. The before, the after. I am not the same person. It is not my first big loss and grieving process, but it is the first loss of a sibling. I am not sure how to do this. I don't want to do this. I am still tumbling from the rug being pulled out, however people all around me are (as am I) going grocery shopping, banking, driving, working, planning....It's like in the movies when the scene is paused but some objects are still going by in slow motion. Surreal. I am so very grateful for the love and support of my husband, kids and grandkids and other siblings, family and friends. I treasure the evening just spent with Tommy, my sisters and brother in law, sharing in communion and prayer, laughing and crying and singing/worshipping together as we remember Paul and hold on to our lifeline, our Hea…

Who Am I

October 27, 1966 I was born (and mostly) raised in and around St-Eustache,Quebec.  A small, yet historically significant town north of Montreal.   If you click on the link, the famous church they are referring to is where I had my first communion and where we had my father's funeral. Our family burial plot is there. 
My Father was French Canadian Catholic.  My mother English Protestant. Let that sink in a moment. That is a whole other story on it’s own.

If you ever get a chance to watch the documentary Quebec My Country Mon Pays, please do. It is so well done!  That will show you the kind of environment I grew up in.  And some of the exact area too, much to my surprise when I watched it. Here is a link to the trailer   It is only 2 minutes long and really worth the watch.  The film itself really resonated with me.  I cried more than once watching it. The Revolution Tranquille and the FLQ crisis.  I remember being 4 yrs old and hiding under our ki…